Sudden onset of depression

About 10 years ago, I began to work as a business consultant and kept travelling feverishly all over the country. People around me viewed me as a powerful career oriented woman. Even when I was exhausted, I continued to work because I thought I had to maintain this image. So even when I felt anxious or apprehensive, I kept up this façade and did not show any weakness.

One day, I was taken to the hospital as I had trouble breathing. The doctor diagnosed this event as a symptom of a panic disorder. After undergoing testing, I learned that my internal organs were severely damaged, and I was hospitalized. Later I was diagnosed with depression.

I was able to return home but I started staying in bed almost all day long, unable to do any household chores. It was astounding that I could fall so far after being able to work so hard with such energy. I tried so many different treatments but to no avail. I lost any hope to do anything, and stayed in the house crying every day, wondering how I could end my life. However, one day I told myself I just could not just go on like this, and asked an old friend for help. That is when I encountered Miross.

Forgiving myself

I had to gather all my strength and managed to go out to go to a Miross seminar recommended by my friend. When I listened to the lecture, my intuition told me that this might free me from my excruciating situation.

I trusted my intuition and decided to take a course at the school, and hoped to learn more about the Miross system. As the teacher led me and other participants who had a similar life theme as mine, I was able to view my past experiences from an objective point of view and understood clearly the reasons why I had become depressed.

Being seen as a super-powerful woman, I was a perfectionist and had never shown any of my weaknesses to others. Indeed, I always had high standards and was hard on myself, however I knew that there was a gap between my reality and my standards. When I was unable to do something, I could not forgive myself and believed that I was worthless. I unconsciously bound myself by imposing many strict rules on myself. I also blamed myself when I strayed from the rules even slightly and at the same time hated myself for being so weak.

Through the Miross system, I discovered why I had become depressed. I tried to rest, using depression as the reason, simply to relieve the exhaustion caused by my thought patterns. I realized that I had created a foolish drama written and enacted by myself: I made my rules, blamed myself, developed my disease, and suffered from it. “How silly it was!”, I simply had to laugh.

My depression gave me the opportunity to encounter Miross, which is where I was able to achieve the viewpoint to truly see myself. “Everything was fine with me.”Miross enabled me to accept and forgive myself for the first time in my life.

Starting a new way of living

The moment I discovered the mechanism which caused my depression, I said to myself, “I will not live like this anymore”, and made up my mind to quit the way of living that I had led so far and chose a new one. I started a new life, one where I did not try to meet other people’s expectations and simply listen to my inner voice to do what I truly wanted to do.

Then I felt so free to do anything. Things just started pouring out from deep within. When I thought about eating, I was able to eat. When I thought about cooking or exercising, I was able to do it. I was soon able to go out of my house on a regular basis. Before I knew, I was freed from the depression that had kept me down for over 10 years. It was so amazing to see the way I was able to transform myself. I was the most astonished at the change in my life.

When I applied the Miross system to my life, I realized that everything depends on what I do, and I felt like I was born again. Now I’m enjoying my life with enthusiasm and look forward with hope to the second life awaiting me.